Monday

SUMMER WARS



I watched "summer wars" the other night and was pretty much blown away. It's by director who did 'The girl who leapt through time' (also very good) It essentially nails the way my aging brain deals with concepts like "the internet". We downloaded a very high quality version but it was so dense certain parts set in "OZ" (you'll see) bogged down the computer with its graphic too-muchery.

GET THIS.

petty much gangster.

Friday

dissed connection. *that pun was so bad ass*



Gold Saturn on Lake Wheeler - m4w (Lake Wheeler) 24yr

We made eye contact going down Lake Wheeler.If you get this let me know and describe something about me.

---real conversation below. -----

AL: that's weird

MM: what.

AL: I guess some missed connections are shorter than others but I feel like there's no connection from one moving vehicle to another. It's crazy. (Motioning like a cop) Pull it over.

MM: That's not true. We've been taught by Dentene commercials that that kind of thing can be romantic.

AL: Sounds more like Mentos to me.

MM: No, like the commercial where the girl breathes on the glass...

AL: Oh... and writes her phone number or something.. I mean, I guess, but imagine a dude doing that. The moment you see a guy breathing on the glass of his car window you speed the fuck up. We've been taught that by psycho movies and Law and Order: SVU.


Thursday

LAMES CAMERON/NIGHT NIGHT SHYAMAMALAN



so the director who done brung us the village and circles went and made a live action version of Avatar: the last airbender. I've been watching it with MM and the Nickelodeon version is actually really good.

this would be a better movie, though


AVATAR: the last mind bender starring chriss angel.

AVATAR: the last gender bender

AVATAR: the last bender
AVATAR: the last Ben Kingsly


That's all I got for now.
lame train.

Sunday

i propably shouldn't post this.

So i was looking up a few pornographic parodies of films and i found this list. It's some of the names seem dubious, even by these standards, but then again, the most ridiculous ones on the list (Edward penis hands, Hairy Daughter and The Philosopher's Bone, and so on) do exist.
enjoy.

I was going to accompany this post with the movie's promo images but it seemed a but much. look em up yourself. My google browser is gross enough as it is. \

(ps, this is totally lifted from another page wholesale. sorry punks.)


* Lock, Cock, And Two Smoking Buttholes
* In-Da-Penis Day
* Kiddy Fiddler On The Roof
* You've Got Male Genitailia!
* Bowling for Concubines
* The Spoonies
* Logan's Come
* A Tale Of Two Titties
* The Gay Team
* Æon Fucks
* Bi-Transsexual Man
* American Dyke-Hoe
* Men in Blacks
* A Scanner Darky
* Bang-Cock Dangerous
* A Cock-and-Lips Now!
* The Bare Bitch Project
* Cat On A Hot Teen Poof
* Anal in the Outfield
* An Inconvenient Tooth
* 2001: A Face Odyssey
* Being Inside John Malkovich
* The Man Who Blew Too Little
* Bone In 60 Seconds
* A.I.: Artificial Insemination
* Lotion's Eleven
* Anal-ize This
* Dr. Strangeglove Or: How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Love It In The Bum
* Daughterworld
* Honey, I Fucked The Kids!
* 101 Menstruations
* Hairy Daughter and The Philosopher's Bone
* Hairy Daughter and The Chamber of Semen
* Hairy Daughter and The Prisoner's Ass-Cabin
* Hairy Daughter and The Knoblet of Desire
* Hairy Daughter and The Order of The Penis
* Hairy Daughter and The Half-Black Prince
* Hairy Daughter and The Filthy Hollows
* All Quiet On The Western Cunt
* AVP - Anal Vaginal Penetration
* Face Invaders
* Gays of Thunder
* Open Daughter
* Much Ado About Fucking
* Das Booty
* Laid In Manhattan
* Donkey Punch-Drunk Love
* We Were Sodomites
* 2 Fists 2 Furious
* Kangaroo Jack-Off
* Lost In Menstruation
* 50 First Rapes
* Around The World With 80 Gays
* Dong Of The Dead
* The Dicks Of Hazzard
* Donnie Dark-Hoe
* I Heart Fuckabee's
* The Life Erotic
* The A-Fist-O-Crats
* House Of Waxy Discharge
* North Cuntry
* The Da Vinci Load
* Dave Chappelle's Cock Party
* Cherry Poppins
* The Pooncock Saints
* Left 4 Head
* 300...People Having Sex
* Oh, She's Eleven
* Shaving Ryan's Privates
* Lawrence of a Labia
* Night Of The Giving Head
* Itty Bitty Gang Bang
* Shitty Shitty Gang-bang
* Muffy the Vampire Layer
* Glad He Ate Her
* Black Cock Down
* In Diana Jones
* Inspect Her Gadget
* Men In Black (who like to have sex with each other)"
* Schindler's Fist
* Schlong Blade
* Sheep Impact
* Womb Raider
* Sex Trek: The Next Penetration
* Star Whores
* Twin Cheeks
* Tango and Gash
* Dick, Tracy?
* For Your Thighs Only
* In and Out in Beverly Hills
* The T & A Team
* Edward Penishands
* Sargent Pecker's Lonely Hearts Gang Bang
* E3: The Extra-Testicle
* Flesh Gordon
* King Dong
* Pulp Friction
* Malcolm XXX
* Ally McSqueal
* The Blown Ranger
* Lord Of The Cock Rings
* The Porn Identity
* 28 Gays Later
* Triple Dix's
* Bangman: The Dark Knight
* The 14 Year Old Virgin
* Rodzilla
* XXX-Men
* Roadclit
* James Cunt
* Cocky III
* Bad Toys
* Clithanger
* Blowwhite
* Bangbi
* Spancock
* 10.000 B.J.
* Requiem for a Cream
* Casabangca
* Mr. and Mrs. Clit
* 6-Mile
* The Wedding Bangers
* Indiana Bones
* Sheepless in Montana
* Moby's Dick
* National Pleasure
* American Fistery XXX
* ALF: Anal Loving Furries
* The Boner Collector
* The 6th Penis
* Iron Man
* Snatchmen

* The Ozporns
* I Know Who You Did Last Summer
* Saturday Night Beaver
* Indiana Bones in the Temple of Poon
* Black Snake Blown
* Alpha Doggystyle
* Titty Titty Bang Bang
* An Officer and a Genitalman
* MySpace
* Analstasia
* Butch Lesbian and the Lapdance Kid
* Dial M for Missionary
* Dog-Style Afternoon
* Enema of the State
* Fantastic Foursome: Rise of the Silver Schlong
* Resident Anal
* Halloweiner
* Hannah Does Her Sisters
* Honey, I Blew Everybody!
* I Cream On Genie
* In-Your-Rear-Endance Day
* Invasion Of The Snatch Prodders
* Lord Of The Rims
* On Golden Blonde
* The Bare Bitch Project
* The Da Vinci Load
* Willy Wanker and the Cocklate Factory
* The Number 69
* Riding In Boys With Cars
* Tailiens

* The Giver
* A Cockwork Orange
* Jurassic Poke
* Friday the 69th
* Two and a Half Men
* As Hard As It Gets
* Beverly Hills Cocks
* 2069: A Space Orgy
* A Nightmare on Dyke Street
* Anal-ize This
* Beaverly Hills Cop
* Shag The Dog
* Choke-A-Hontas
* Poke-a-Hot-Ass
* Divine Secretions of the Vaja Sisterhood
* Easy Ride Her
* Genital Hospital
* Grand Theft Anal
* Hairy Pooter
* Gonad the Barbarian
* Intercourse with a Vampire
* Interview With a Vibrator
* Miracle on 69th Street
* Missionary Impossible
* Pee-wee Sperming's Big Adventure
* Pumping Irene
* The Rocky Porno Video Show
* Screw the Right Thing
* Sgt. Pecker’s Lonely Heart’s Club Gangbang
* Who Reamed Robin Rabbit?
* Charlie Wilson's Whore
* Ate Men Out
* Ate Mile
* Battlestar Orgasmica
* Captain Hooker and Peter Porn
* Erectnophobia
* Fahrenheit 69
* The Long Ranger
* The Rodfather
* The Sexorcist
* The Slutty Professor
* The Sperminator
* The XXX Files
* School of Cock
* V for Vagina
* Weapons of Ass Destruction
* Whore of the Worlds
* Wet Quim For A Dream
* Charlie and the Cockolate Factory
* Star Whores: A New Grope
* Dark Side of the Poon
* Wish You Were Queer

Kinda Fucking Lame

* Queers and Boning in Las Vegas
* A Tale of Two Titties
* A Midsummer's Wet Dream
* Broadcast Nudes
* Cherry Potter
* There's Something About Gary
* Crocodile Dun-Me
* Cumming to America
* Cum On Eileen
* Eat the Robinsons
* Frosty the Blowman
* Her Meat-Tricks
* World Of Whorecraft
* Backsides to the Future
* Beaverjuice
* Dickman and Throbbing
* Ferris Bueller's Jack Off
* Facial Attraction
* Forrest Hump
* Ghostlusters
* Good Will Humping
* Headtv
* Gilligan's Asshole
* Knobit
* Little Shop of Whores
* Mad Maxine Beyond Thunderbone
* Murphy's Brown
* NYDP Blew
* Poop Dreams
* Reservoir Bitches
* Smokin’ Asses
* Snatch Adams
* Sperms of Endearment
* Tales from the Clit
* The Empire Strokes Black
* The Horny-Mooners
* The Humpback of Nasty Dames
* The Hunt for Miss October
* The Load Warrior
* The Man With the Golden Penis
* The Replacement Drillers
* The Sixth Inch
* The Touchables
* The Whore of the Worlds
* You’ve Got Tail
* 20,000 Legs Under the Sea
* 2002: A Sex Odyssey
* 9 1/2 Inches
* A Clockwork Orgy
* Ali-G in da Mouse
* American Hair Pie
* Anus and Andy
* Anus the Menace
* Apackolips Now
* Ass Rider
* Ass Ventura: Smut Detective

* Blast from the Pants
* Boobarella
* Beaver and Buttface
* Cliff Banger
* Death Poof
* Drilling Miss Daisy
* Fill Bill
* First Times at Cherry High
* Flashpants: Cop a Feeling
* Frisky Business
* FudgePac Man
* Full Metal Bikini
* Hard & Harder
* Indiana Joan and the Temple of Poon
* Indiana Jones in the Temple of Poon
* In RearEndence Day
* Into the Wild Woman
* Jennifer Ate
* Juranal Park
* Lord Of The G-Strings
* Lust in Space
* Mad Jack: Beyond Thunderbone
* Mighty Joe Schlung
* Mutiny on the Booty
* Natural Born Thrillers
* Pornocchio
* Rage of Bonan
* Rambone
* Romancing the Bone
* Romeo Does Juliet
* Sexcalibur
* Sex Trek: Penetrations
* Splendor In The Ass
* Suck Rodgers in the 69th Century
* Terms of Endowment
* The Amityville Whorer
* The Ass Farmer
* The Bitches of Madison County
* The Bootyguard
* The Flintbones
* The Good, The Bad, And the Horny
* The Joy Suck Club
* The Maddam’s Family
* The Naked Bun
* The Pink Lagoon
* The Porn Birds
* The Queer Hunter
* The Sex Family Robinson
* The Sex Files
* The Talented Mr. Lickme
* The Texas Dildo Massacre
* The Wadd Squad
* Total Reball
* Waddzilla
* Watersports World
* Wet Dream Girls
* Wetness for the Prosecution
* When Harry Ate Sally
* White Men Can't Hump
* Willy Wonka and the Hershey Highway
* Yank My Doodle, It's a Dandy
* Casawanker
* Monster's Balls
* Three's Company
* Blow
* Lord of the Rings
* Lord of the Rings: Fellowship Of The Ring
* Wet Hot American Summer
* Fiddler On The Roof
* Mary Poppins
* Balls of Fury
* Snatch
* Toy Story
* The African Queen
* xXx
* Dick
* Gay Niggers From Outer Space
* Meatballs
* Freddy Got Fingered
* Deep Impact
* Unlawful Entry
* Splash
* Kiss Kiss Bang Bang
* The Midnight Meat Train
* The Passion
* Free Willy
* Growing Pains
* Malcolm in the Middle
* Scream
* The Goodies
* Mother, Speed, and Jugs

Saturday

who even listens to this stuff?

My girlfriend likes to tell people that I (in sarcastic voice) Drop hot techno beats.
In reality, very little of the music I deal with is formal "techno". I couldn't tell her that because she thinks it's dumb on some levels. I'm inclined to agree with her. Who really cares? As long as it's relevant, fun and engaging why sweat taxonomy?

I do have to say that the verbal pigeonholing of dance music subsubgenres becomes a valuable tool when I need to find a certain needle sound in the internet haystack of available music. Thats why I have to insist that this is not techno, but dubstep. It would be possible to further describe the following mix, but it would just be convoluted and extraneous. Simply listen for those LFO wobbles and hammerfall percussion lines and you'll know what's what. seriously. And get a SOUNDCLOUD account. It's radstical.


Torqux n Twist - SkrewFace Mix by Torqux

Friday

this is a real show



The Knife Show
comes on once a week, is 6 hours long and predominantly hosted by a guy who is pretty much Hank Hill. Michela and I both saw them misspell tortoise as TOURTOUS and TORTIOSES a minute ago.











Don't watch high or your eyeball might fall out of your face and onto the floor.

Sunday

He didn't know.

Family Fun and Fellowship on blogger.




















If my family had a blog when I was growing up it would have been called "I'm going to kill him this time, I swear to god."

elija in concert




front row and I'm tripping balls.

I know you know

but this video is the shit.


way to be, Lee.




Lee Walton Spent some time at elsewhere filming for a project. There were cameras everywhere aimed at people doing very mundane things. I have no idea what the final product is going to be (maybe that was it) but either way I'm stoked to have been a part of it.

Lee is clever. What's more, he's inspiring. He gave a presentation of his work over the years and I was tearing up with laughter. One project of particular hilarity was "F'book", video reenactments of status updates.


Here is a video i found today called "pulling strings" that's pretty charming.




look out for this guy... he's a real winner and go-getter.
Check out his website for more radicality.


be sure to check out "making changes"

Saturday

Fake is Gr8- Mark Jenkins in winston salem



Mark Jenkins is a social practice artist. That basically means that the physical products of his work are tools for establishing a particular interaction. These are not sculptures but props for a performance that takes place every time they are looked at by the viewer. As Stephen Maticjio (Curator, SECCA) quotes him:


And while these agents can be considered in the tradition of sculpture, Jenkins sees them less as art, and more as “questions.” More
specifically, he places these objects into the environment with no intention of reclaiming
them – allowing these questions/agents to “live” in public space without
restrictions, labels, or expectations.

(the rest of the essay available here)

I saw him speak at SECCA in winston-salem with some other folks from Elsewhere Artist Collective, since we do some of the ole' social practice art ourselves and I was pretty underwhelmed by the guy. He's not a terribly great speaker and his artwork lost a good deal of it's punch when I heard him describe it's more shocking aspects with a blithe and affected tone of boredom.

This was especially annoying when he dealt with the moment at which these mock humans could be described as a mean practical joke on the viewer. This piece got a police report, since it looks like a corpse:

There was a guy standing next to me at the lecture was absolutely livid at this. I was embarrassed because the man was turning red with anger, getting shriller and shriller as he repeated the phrase "Isn't it just advertising for you when this happens? People get scared! you profit from fear" and he kept saying "well, that's just, like, your opinion"...

I still like the guy's work, but don't look for anything more profound than the "wow, neat." moment.

here's some neat stuff from winston.













s


wow. Lee Walton is way cooler anyway.